Day 234

So it's been about 110 days since my last post. 10 days after my last post, I started my new job. Compared to what I was making previously I took about a $10k pay cut, but guess what? I'm loving my new job AND it's in my field! Hope finally evolved into motivation. It was a fine day that I never thought would arrive. Motivation is my support for the days I'm really missing being home with my amazingly supportive family and putting up with stresses at work. Reading back through my first 21 days of being 29, I long for the creativity that used to come so easily in my words. It's been a hell of an adjustment period, this last 110 days that I've been absent! I'm back in the wake up, go to work, come home, eat dinner, do homework, try to relax with my men, and then off to bed mode. It seems a never ending cycle, and it can be trying at times..that and it sucks every ounce of energy I have.

On a separate but related note, school is going well. I'm happy to announce that I will have my bachelor's in pscyhology with a concentration in graduate studies no later than January 2011! Hopefully, I will have it before I'm 30 (by November), but if not, I'm happy either way. It was kind of a shock to me when I found this news out earlier this week; as I've just been plucking away and registering for whatever I could after each set of clsses ends. So now onto the next big thing. My masters......which eludes to part of the reason I have the urge to see my thoughts via my blog again.

I have way too much on my plate right now. While adjusting to work (and with an unruly, abrasive, and rude coworker), I'm trying to maintain the positive attitude I had when it was only hope moving me forward. Now that hope has evolved into motivation, I feel that my hunger for more has exceeded my fill capacity once again. A couple of old friends, anxiety, insomnia, and nightmares have returned this past week. Anxiety just kind of lurks in the shadows while insomnia and nightmares try to party with me every night. I don't know if it was the shock that I'm about to hit another milestone on my list of goals, or just the additional stress that is about to ensue. Maybe it's the constant juggling act I feel I run through every single day? All of the above? Either way, sleep is avoiding me at all costs, as if I have uncurable body odor, and it can't stand to be around me. So tonight I'll spray my lavender and vanilla linen spray on my bed and hope I can trick sleep into thinking I smell good again....